Big-box retailers who shout at you in TV commercials will try to tell you their range of Christmas gifts is ‘special’, ‘exclusive’ and ‘selling out fast’. But how can that be? The very same mass-produced, mass-sourced goods are available at the competitor barn just down the road. Retailers committed to a truly unique shopping experience must work much harder to source distinctive, high-quality products for discerning customers.
Listen up, corporate communicators. When you assure me that you take my health and safety very seriously and will be reviewing your systems and processes to ensure they are robust, you insult my intelligence so badly you may as well use sweary words. A good statement should stimulate my intellect and be subtle, creative, topical and unforgettable – rather like those on Blackwell and Sons’ brand-new proprietary range of T shirts.
Choice. It’s what makes a good political system, supermarket and love life. Woops, was that last one out loud? It’s also the essence of a great gift. When you’re shopping for someone you love and happen upon an emporium of wowness, where do you begin? Easy. A gift card opens up the entire gamut of options for the recipient. Cue squeals of appreciation.
There are dozens of book-related metaphors: You can’t judge one by its cover. Time to turn over a new leaf. Let’s shelve that idea. There are none inspired by e-books. That’s partly because the ancient and noble art of metaphor writing no longer pays the rent. But it’s largely because there’s a romance attached to printed books that e-books can only electron-frisson about.
Like Australian Prime Ministers, Big Bang Theory and tattoos, some things have just had their day. Calling time is the right and proper thing to do. We’ve had a great run from our Swell, 24 and Klean Kanteen drinkware, but their gig is up. We’re getting set to roll out a dazzling new state-of-the-art drinkware range, so if you’re a fan of the old, be in or go thirsty!